Once upon a time, there was a grand place of eating called Los Paisanos Taqueria. Sadly, I had not the chance to visit such a place before they closed, but the legend of grandeur was passed down to me through casual browsing of the Internet. Apparently they had something called the Tortasaurus:
Indigenous people feared the Tortasaurus, and would paint pictures of the beast in caves.
Here is a dude trying to eat a Tortasaurus:
Let’s take a look at a dude that conquered Tortasaurus:
Firstly, how fucking cool is that shirt? Secondly, you really don’t see enough pictures with people getting the bunny ears. It really is a comic device that never fails to deliver a true belly laugh, much like a man getting punched in the nuts, or someone’s hair standing on end after an electric shock. Hilarious!
Thirdly, you know what helps you choke down that massive amount of torta? Coffee baby!:
Nothing says ‘Hand-roasted Artisan Coffee’ like serving your coffee in a Gatorade cooler.
The high price of ‘Hand-roasting’
If you look behind the Tamer of The Tortasaurus’ head, you will find even more indigenous artwork:
I’m truly saddened by the closing of this restaurant. RIP Los Paisanos.